Three Cheers for Comcast!!!

The Portland Trailblazers are currently pressing Comcast to license their broadcasts to other carriers. Thanks guys, that really helps. Too bad the Blazers signed an ill-advised ten-year contract with Comcast. Three years into it and Comcast still hasn’t fulfilled its promise to allow Blazer games on other television carriers. Who saw this coming? Well, unfortunately, anybody that can read. When the contract was signed, Blazers fans were pissed. John Canzano was pissed. Other television carriers were pissed. Why? Because Comcast single handedly decides the rates it will charge to carry Comcast Sports Net, the official home of the Blazers. In a brilliant ploy for market share, Comcast set the rates too high for any sensible corporation to comply. Thereby ensuring the only way to get the Blazer games is by ordering Comcast.

Now the Blazers front office is beginning to see their folly. Unfortunately there’s very little they can do about it for 7 more years. See, that’s the funny thing about contracts. They’re BINDING, you fucking idiots. To this day I still refuse to forfeit my integrity (money) to the knuckleheads at Comcast. Instead, I spend three times as much money by going to local bars for Blazer games. Hey, at least the beer is cheaper than the Rose Garden.

The funny thing is, I’ve adapted to the situation and have come to realize watching sports is much better when surrounded by other drunken idiots rooting for the Blazers. So tonight, when the Blazers play the hated L.A. Fakers, I’m going to offer a toast to Comcast. Thank you for your greed, thank you for your refusal to be reasonable, and most of all, thank you for getting me out of my house to socialize with all the other loyal Blazer fans who also refuse your strong arm tactics. Cheers Comcast!